For all you merchants/affiliate managers etc out there here is a crash course on how *not* to promote your program to affiliates.

Here is a real email I just received:

"Dear All,

New banners are available in the Affiliate windows login area for you all.

Data feeds are also available on request.

Many thanks

Ben @ TOFFS"

Well isn't that great? Toffs have...wait for it...some new banners! Fantastic!

It wouldn't be as bad if we were even told that it was a new banner promoting xyz and that it is really special because nobody else has this product etc. But really, some new banners. WOW!

I'm sorry Toffs but in a crowded marketplace you really need to grab your affiliates attention with something a bit more exciting than new banners.

What I'm listening to right now: Mantronix - "Don't Go Messin' With My Heart"